Friday, July 9, 2010

YMCA called back

well - I talked to the coordinator who got my email.  She was very apologetic and agreed that it was a mistake that never should have happened.  She figures that some of the volunteers may have assumed it was over and wandered off or something because there was a motorcycle cop who drove the course to let people know the race was over - there were only 2 people they had to tell that to.  So I feel much better about it now!
Wednesday I did an open water swim - roughly 440m - in a local lake.  It felt great!

Today I was talking to my husband about the fact that while I can run longer distances and I did keep up with the other swimmers (who are all athletic) I still don't see myself as an athlete - I'm still surpised when my body does athletic stuff.  It's the same as staring at the label in my pants and thinking there's some mistake, no way I fit in 12's!  (yes - I fit in several of my size 12 pants!!  See picture below for proof!)

It's all just so weird - how my own image and how I view myself does not at all match what I see and do.  Ironically - and this might just be KEY - is that when I'm eating something I shouldn't/overeating - that's when I feel like that's who I AM! 

I totally don't WANT to be a compulsive eater - I would really rather be that person who goes running daily because she LIKES to and forgets to eat a meal...that's who I want to be.

The million dollar quesiton is how do I get there?? 

Ok - that's my deep thoughts for today - I've got a busy weekend:  tomorrow we pick up our foreign exchange student and our already busy life gets even busier!!

I will keep checking in though - see you soon!!


1 comment:

Julie, The Accidental Fat Chick said...

I have a problem with the image thing too. When I was heavier, I would "forget" in a sense how big I was until I went shopping for clothes or *gulp* looked in a mirror. Now that I've lost some of the weight, its weird, but its almost like I feel more like the "fat" person I used to be. Weird how the mind plays tricks on us...